Post by Klayia_Greenleaf on Jan 29, 2002 17:48:00 GMT -5
"Not so fast, Mr. Tostitos.. I mean Mr. Frito!," said Spam sternly and jumping into the boat with him. "Mr. Grandgolfer made me promise that I'd stick with you, and Golly Gosh Crapsie, I'm gonna!"
He slapped one end of a pair of handcuffs on Frito's right arm and the other end on his own left arm, took out the key and tossed it into the river. Then he snatched up the toupee from where it was floating next to the boat. He pulled a tube of superglue from his pocket, squeezed the whole thing onto Frito's head and then plopped the toupee down on top.
"There! Now you won't have to worry about losing it anymore! Now let's go to Moredorks!"
"Spam, you pea-brained, moron of a…"
"Now, don't thank me Mr. Frito. I promised, I did and I'm going with you all the way!"
"It seems strangely quiet here!" said LegoLass back at the camp.
"What was that?", yelled Gimme over the din of 5000 wild screaming dorks that were dashing around, yelling at the top of their lungs, and smashing everything in sight.
"I said it is STRANGELY QUIET!", screamed LegoLass.
"Yeah, Strangled Riot is one of my favorite bands, too!", yelled Gimme.
"Help! We're being kidnapped!", screamed Pigbutt and Gloomy.
"You hear anything?" asked Gimme.
"Nope."
"I must insist that you stop this infernal chatter and unhand those irresponsible, Halflings!", said Boringmere. "They are not your personal property, after all, since the Omnibus- Anti-slavery and Emancipation Act of Gondola from 2359 clearly states that…"
"KILL BORING GASBAG MAN!!!!", shrieked the head dork, a knarled green- skinned lump of a figure with an unbelievably bad underarm smell to him.
"DIE HU-MON!", screamed a couple of thousand similar looking dorks with a similar smell to them.
They all simultaneously began pelting Boringmere with stale dill pickles. He managed to stay upright and fend off the first few, but he soon vanished under a pile of preserved cucumbers.
"Alas, thus passes Boringmere, the Brave!", said Wussie solemnly as the dorks ran away carrying Pigbutt and Gloomy.
"I think he's still alive. I can hear him shouting in there." said Gimme. "If we hurry, we could dig him out before he suffocates."
"Think about what you just said", put in LegoLass.
A sudden smile appeared on Gimme's thoughtful face, which quickly disappeared behind a mask of fake sorrow.
"Verily! Alas, thus passes Boringmere, the Brave!", he intoned.
He slapped one end of a pair of handcuffs on Frito's right arm and the other end on his own left arm, took out the key and tossed it into the river. Then he snatched up the toupee from where it was floating next to the boat. He pulled a tube of superglue from his pocket, squeezed the whole thing onto Frito's head and then plopped the toupee down on top.
"There! Now you won't have to worry about losing it anymore! Now let's go to Moredorks!"
"Spam, you pea-brained, moron of a…"
"Now, don't thank me Mr. Frito. I promised, I did and I'm going with you all the way!"
"It seems strangely quiet here!" said LegoLass back at the camp.
"What was that?", yelled Gimme over the din of 5000 wild screaming dorks that were dashing around, yelling at the top of their lungs, and smashing everything in sight.
"I said it is STRANGELY QUIET!", screamed LegoLass.
"Yeah, Strangled Riot is one of my favorite bands, too!", yelled Gimme.
"Help! We're being kidnapped!", screamed Pigbutt and Gloomy.
"You hear anything?" asked Gimme.
"Nope."
"I must insist that you stop this infernal chatter and unhand those irresponsible, Halflings!", said Boringmere. "They are not your personal property, after all, since the Omnibus- Anti-slavery and Emancipation Act of Gondola from 2359 clearly states that…"
"KILL BORING GASBAG MAN!!!!", shrieked the head dork, a knarled green- skinned lump of a figure with an unbelievably bad underarm smell to him.
"DIE HU-MON!", screamed a couple of thousand similar looking dorks with a similar smell to them.
They all simultaneously began pelting Boringmere with stale dill pickles. He managed to stay upright and fend off the first few, but he soon vanished under a pile of preserved cucumbers.
"Alas, thus passes Boringmere, the Brave!", said Wussie solemnly as the dorks ran away carrying Pigbutt and Gloomy.
"I think he's still alive. I can hear him shouting in there." said Gimme. "If we hurry, we could dig him out before he suffocates."
"Think about what you just said", put in LegoLass.
A sudden smile appeared on Gimme's thoughtful face, which quickly disappeared behind a mask of fake sorrow.
"Verily! Alas, thus passes Boringmere, the Brave!", he intoned.
So end the story! What do ya think? I fell out of my chair reading it! 
